July 2008
12 posts
I’m working on some tips to share with friends/family on the best way to use credit cards. I know that sounds beyond boring, but having worked at a credit card company for two years (TWO YEARS! HOMG!), I have encountered many people who do NOT use credit cards correctly and therefore lose tons of money.
Anyways, I’m just keeping a log of the tips I’d like to use (see below). ...
Consumer blogs (like fatwallet.com, consumerist.com, etc) are a good way to measure the opinions of a certain segment of customers. The segment self-selects into reading and posting on these blogs, so many are concerned about their finances, being ripped off, and advocating for consumer rights. I read these blogs from time to time when I’m trying to develop products and strategies at...
Another job I'd want
“Receiver of delivered coffee.”
I wonder how to dress for that, so someone will bring me coffee whenever I would like. Nekkid might work for that one too but the risk metric would be significantly increased.
Dress for the job you want
I started thinking about the job I want. I would love for Capital One to fire me. So the best outfit to get me fired would probably be no outfit. Nekkid!
I wish an antiexclamation point existed. Exclamation points feel too cheerful to express an angry yet surprised thought.
Possibilities:
“I look ugly today <!>”
“I hate you !=”
“This has carrots in it ? *!* “
Waherds
Words that make me recoil whilst job searching (a dynamic list):
Process (this is code for rules).
Cash flow (this is code for your job will suck).
Financial (is not code for anything).
PhD (this is code for I’m too stupid).
Analyst (this is what I already am and in the process of fleeing).
Attention to Detail (code for boring).
Over(t)ly caffienated.
I’m getting pretty good at Friend Filtering.
You could get so used to pouring yourself Brita water and trustingly drinking it that you fail to SPOT THE COCKROACH in it. Your Brita filter is not error proof.
May 2008
3 posts
http://garfieldminusgarfield.tumblr.com/page/16 John Arbuckle of Garfield Minus Garfield reminds me of Nick.
I’ve told Nick I love him probably like 10 times. When I say it, he either changes the topic or just sits there and doesn’t respond. It’s really sad. Not sad so much because he won’t say it back (although that part isn’t really awesome either). It is sad because I know this is the reason I will eventually leave him and it makes me sad that I know I’ll do this...
How To Be Happy
Whenever I visit my friends or family, I get jealous. Everyone has something(s) I don’t! My dad has one of those refrigerator wine cellars! Rory gets free housing and food and gets to live with that refrigerator wine cellar thing! Brian gets to live by that Japanese restaurant that I love! Stacy has her own parking garage to park in (and ALWAYS seems to, no matter where she lives)! I...
April 2008
30 posts
“A universe reduced to what was said in it was tidiness indeed, almost to the...”
– Ian McEwan
I don’t really want to live in a huge city. I actually HATE huge cities. I hate spending hours a day in traffic, I hate how everything’s dirty, and how everything that actually is beautiful is so overrun with people that you can’t experience it. Which is why I’m unsure why I’m moving to DC. I think I’ll have lots of job opportunities there, but I have lots of...
My love, when unrequited, has a half life of about 1 day, similar to many commonly prescribed pharmaceuticals. Every few days I fall in love with Nick and two days later, I’m already out of love. Today when he left for church I said, “I love you” on his way out the door. He just looked at me for a few seconds and waved. I decided I didn’t like his effective “I...
Marketing vs. Advertising vs. PR vs. Branding
catbird: @ Brand Autopsy
“In rapid order, sponsorship went from being a rare occurrence (in the...”
– Naomi Klein, No Logo *The LA Olympics ended on August 12, 1984.
Maybe I'd be outside as you passed on your bike
I hooked up with P on and off for about 9 months. While some people could pop out a baby in the space of nine months, I chose to invest that time in events such as Drunk ‘80’s Night at Banditos! Drunk Horse Races! Drunk Cornhole (What? Exactly.)! Drunk Beach! Drunk Kickball! Drunk Baltimore! With so many exclamation points, there’s no way that it wasn’t a fantastic gestation period (Drunk...
True Love
O'Donnell, Haley [10: 39 AM]:
i love you
Pfeifer, Nicholas [10: 40 AM]:
hi
Pfeifer, Nicholas [10: 41 AM]:
: )
O'Donnell, Haley [10: 41 AM]:
hi
O'Donnell, Haley [10: 45 AM]:
hi
Pfeifer, Nicholas [10: 45 AM]:
hi
O'Donnell, Haley [10: 45 AM]:
ok
“Products that are remarkable get talked about.”
Step One:
Hire a PR rep. Fini!
As a result, here’s what my Q2 project prioritization list looks like: Job search Rebrand self Train for 150 mile bike ride Crack the stock market
Oh,
I’ve decided to rebrand myself.
Rebranding
We recently rebranded Capital One in the wake of our acquisition of two major banks (Hibernia in the South, North Fork in NYC). Now that we’re a company that includes credit cards, banks, auto finance, home loans, etc., we’ve had to abandon our previous brand of being a “maverick” in the financial industry (yes, the word “maverick” was actually used). Instead,...
Not-So-Good Vibrations
A dialogue for two parts. Resemblance to actual people and events is entirely intended. Setting: Fortune 500 company, small conference room. Man and Woman are in the midst of conversation when the audience arrives. Woman: By the way. I’m going to kill somebody if we don’t have sex soon. Man: I’m nervous. You’re not on birth control anymore. Woman: I know. Ok we...
Update 2
Nick responded as per usual - the sneaky non-response. This is a very efficient technique: the person who asked the question in the first place is placed with the burden of 1) re-asking the uncomfortable question, thus making it expontentially MORE awkward, or 2) countering with silence, meaning the issue never gets addressed. Tricky. To be honest I don’t know if I would move in with him. ...
Crisis averted via 0 exertion of effort
So Nick found out I have a blog. His dotcom prowess will probably hunt it down. At first it was very much an “oh shit” moment, but if your significant other can’t handle your honesty, then what’s the point?
Update 1
I realized that this idea came from watching The Gauntlet 3 Reunion last night. Frank & Gillian AND Brad & Tori are already moving in together. No fair!
Alert
I just calculated the increased cost of living for when I move to Northern Virginia/DC. I need to bump up my salary $6k to $10k!!! So I just IMed Nick that “maybe we should live together in NoVA.” I don’t even particularly WANT to, but to save that much cash (cuz I bet he’d cut me a deal), I would. I think I will be unhappy with an answer of either “yes” or...
Lady
I found this today. Old School but Good School. I don’t think I ever change: I think flavored water is pretty much awesome. In fact, I once dated someone pretty much because we were both huge fans of Propel Fitness Water (common interests are important for a healthy relationship). Today at the grocery store, after noticing Propel was on sale for only 50 cents a bottle, I started throwing...
Smile!
To photograph people is to violate them, by seeing them as they never see themselves, by having knowledge of them they can never have; it turns people into objects that can be symbolically possessed (13). A photograph passes for incontrovertible proof that a given thing happened. The picture may distort; but there is always a presumption that something exists, or did exist, which is like what’s...
March 2008
18 posts
I think that after the honeymoon phase of a relationship, there’s a brief transitional I’m-so-mad-I’m-not-in-the-honeymoon phase, which is really just the world testing whether you like someone enough to be pissy about them for a few weeks. I think I’ve entered the phase AFTER that one. I don’t know what it is yet.
She's A Working Girl
I have been so locked in my little world today that I almost 100% forgot that I’m at work. It makes me wonder if I would like a job that keeps me 100% present and aware that I’m at the job of my dreams, or a job in which I don’t even realize I’m working because I’m so in the zone.
Could you at least *pretend* Make It Rain?
Bad is so much more fun to write about than good, but I suppose I’ll have to take the good with the bad. Nick has an idea about “cracking the stock market.” While that phrase doesn’t actually make any sense, the point is that he thinks this is possible and that with our powers combined we can do it. (Alternate ideas include selling solar panels to rural residents and...
Be sure to tune in next Friday for...
I’m writing this to you from Friday, or the day after Nick remembered yesterday was our six month anniversary… But anyways. At the risk of mixing too many metaphors in favor of accurately describing how I feel, I would like to tell you about The Haley Show: Or, N. Pffeiffer* and the Case of the Robotic Girlfriend (*Names have been changed to protect me from Googlers) I’ve...
I'm Pre-Mad
I’ve been working on a new prototype of mad: Pre-Mad. That’s because today is the day before Nick’s going to forget that it’s our six month anniversary. I already know so well the things which will piss me off that now I get to enjoy this irritation days in advance as I brace for the actual event that will annoy me. I also get pre-mad about how he will not invite me to do...